Kayce Lassiter - The Good, The Bad and The UGLY.

Well, here it is another blog Friday and Kayce totally got her days mixed up.  So my apologies if you checked for my blog earlier and it wasn't here.  It was written, it was ready, and then it was MIA.  Argh! 

 

Okay, here we go...I'm so excited.   I finally got the question, "Would you mind if I interviewed you?"  Woo Hoo!  Whee!  Happy dancing across the living room floor!  Alright, I know...silly, but I can't help myself.  I just get so excited.  I'm being interviewed and you are all invited to sit in on it.  Nevermind that the call came from yours truly and I'm interviewing myself.  'Why?'' you ask?  Well.............because I can.  : - )  Roll with it.  We'll have fun.  I promise.  So here goes.  I'm so nervous.  I just hope there aren't any questions I can't answer. 

Why did you decide to interview yourself?  It’s a good gig…you know all the answers and you get to ask only the questions you want to answer.  What’s not to love about that?  (I’m not stupid.)

Where and when were you born and where do you call home?  (You can leave the year off your birth date if you’d like.)  DUH!  Like that isn’t a no-brainer. LOL  I have an August birthday, was born in Phoenix, Arizona, and still live close by in the Valley of the Sun (Valley of the Hotter Than Hell right now!).

What are some day jobs you’ve had and what were the best and worst?  I’ve been a telephone solicitor, receptionist, secretary, computer programmer, project manager, bartender, mother, and writer.  The worst was telephone solicitor and I quit the day I tried to sell magazines to a sobbing woman, only to find she’d just buried her husband…Not a good day for anyone!  The absolute best was mother (most days), but I’d have to say writing runs it a close second.

 

Any pets that you would like to tell us about, share a pic?  OMG, through the years I have had so many pets—horses, goats, cows, dogs, cats, chickens, ducks, geese, pigs, sheep, fish, birds, lizards, guinea pigs, hamsters, tortoises, and one stinking snake!  (Can you tell the snake wasn’t my favorite?)  I currently have four horses—Red, Kentucky, Cody, and Meeko.  I also have three dogs—Toby (named after Toby Keith), Rex (named after no one), and Skay (named by a seven year old).  (I'll scatter some pics of them throughout so you can see what some of them look like.)  The red mare shown here is my old lady.  She is the mustang I adopted from the Bureau of Land Management 26 years ago and she rules the roost around here.
 

Who’s your favorite author and Why?  My favorite author is Janet Evanovich because she makes me laugh out loud.  That’s who I want to be when I grow up!
 

If you had to choose, which writer would you consider a mentor?  Ohmigosh, there are so many writers who have mentored and helped me through the years, but I’d have to say the one I call “mentor” is Amanda Harte-Cabot.  Aside from being a wonderful writer, she was the first person to encourage me to try and she has unfailingly been there by my side the whole way…Amanda, you rock!  Aside from Amanda, I also have to give a shout out to my critique group, the Butterscotch Martini Girls—Brit Blaise, Judi Thoman, Tina Gerow, Cassie Ryan, Dani Petrone, Kayla Janz, Lynne Logan, H.D. Thomson, Samantha Storm, Isabella Clayton, and Lisa Pietsch.  These girls are the ones who keep me straight, prop me up when I start to lean, and drink with me when nothing else works.
 

What makes you cry and what makes you laugh?  I thought this was going to be a complicated answer, but it boiled down to a couple of very simple things.  Love makes me cry…and it can be either the positives or negatives of love—losing someone you love, seeing someone you love hurt, parting from a loved one, weddings, births, graduations, achievements of those you love, and so many other things about love.  What makes me laugh is life—people, me, and stupidity are right at the top of my list.
 

Ever go out in public with your shirt on inside out, or slippers on, and when realizing it, just said screw it?  Of course I have.  What else can you do when you’re 50 miles from home and all you have on your feet is your slippers?  Besides, I love to laugh and make others laugh and if wearing my shirt inside out brings a laugh to someone else, what’s the harm?
 

Are you a “domestic” person?  Make your bed in the morning?  Like to cook?  Those of you who know me are laughing your butts off right now.  Don’t lie…you are too.  Domestic I’m not!  My bed gets made when I know company is coming and if they just show up, my door gets closed and no one gets “the tour”.  (So if you stopped by and didn’t get the tour, you now know why.)  Cooking is something I believe should be reserved for those who can.  My skill happens to be in ordering take-out and I can pick out a really mean TV dinner.

 

Do you prefer fuzzy or tube socks?  In the winter, I prefer fuzzy zany socks.  In the summer, I prefer lightweight zany socks.  (Sensing a pattern, are ya?)  There is never a time for tube socks…they don’t come in zany!
 

Do you have a nickname?  Through the years, I’ve been given a number of nicknames—most of which cannot be printed here without offending at least one person.  But I think my most un-favorite nickname was one given to me in kindergarten, and that one was “Woody Woodpecker”.  The inciting incident was one afternoon when I was playing with some neighbor kids and we were swinging on the vines of their weeping willow tree.  My vine broke (yeah, I know…what were the chances of that?) and I cut my head open on a rock.  My mother (the consummate clown) convinced the doctor that after they’d stitched and bandaged my head, they should leave a little topknot of hair hanging out the top.  Yep, you got it…Woody Woodpecker’s topknot.  (Mom, I still haven’t forgiven you for that!  LOL)
 

What are your pet peeves?  Bad drivers, cockroaches, weeds, telemarketers, toolbars that take over my computer, too few checkers at the store, snail mail, the summer heat in Phoenix, and grocery store parking lots with two aisles in a row both designated to go the same direction (you know who you are!).
 

Coffee or tea?  Favorite food?  Vanilla or chocolate ice-cream?  Coffee!  Mexican food!  And chocolate anything!
 

What is your favorite alcoholic bedtime drink?  Yes!  Oh wait…that wasn’t the question, was it?  Did you miss the part about me being a Butterscotch Martini Girl?
 

What actor or book character do you have a crush on?  Kayla Janz is laughing her butt off over this one and wondering how the hell I managed to miss telling someone.  The actor that makes my heart go barroomph-baroomph would have to be Sam Elliott, and Hugh Jackman runs him a damn close second.  As for book characters that knock my socks off, without a doubt that would be Morelli or Ranger—and they vie for first place depending on which one is flirting with me (er…Stephanie Plum) that particular day.  And for those of you who don’t know who Morelli and Ranger are, you have to pick up One for the Money by Janet Evanovich and begin your E-ticket ride!
 

If you couldn’t be an author, who or what would you want to be?  Katherine Ross or Stephanie Plum.  (The love interests for some of my favorite leading men…see previous question.  LOL)
 

Have you ever read or seen yourself as a character in a book or a movie?  Really?  (Refer back to previous two questions for the answer to this one.)
 

Where did your love of storytelling come from?  I think I would have to say my family.  My parents are deaf and my mother used to be president of the Phoenix Theater for the Deaf, and there isn’t anything that woman won’t do for a laugh!  So she planted the seed and then the rest of the family pretty much gave me a lot of material to work with.  LOL
 

What does your family think of your writing?  They love it, as long as it isn’t about them.  My son has a great deal of difficulty reading my romance books because he’s always afraid I’m going to throw him a curve and put a love scene on the next page that will make him want to stab himself in the forehead with a fork. 

 

Have you ever found true love?  I find it daily in every romance book I read and in real life too.  One thing I have found is that “true love” comes with many faces…sometimes it wears the face of a boyfriend or husband, sometimes the face of a mother or father or grandparent, sometimes the face of a sibling, and sometimes the face of a dear friend.  But the wonderful thing is that life gives us all many opportunities to find it…all we have to do is be open to it.
 

Are you jealous of other writers?  Insanely!
 

What was the hardest part of writing and did you learn anything from it?  The first word.  Yes, I learned once you get past that, it doesn’t get any easier.  You will continue to agonize over each and every one.
  

Have you ever hated something you wrote?  No…everything I write is perfect (NOT).  Yes, I have, and you’ll see it when pigs fly!  LOL
 

How long did it take you to finish your first book?  Which time?  LOL  As most writers know, the first time you write “The End”…is only the beginning.  In my case, it turned out the first book was only half a book and it had the wrong ending for a romance.  Argh!  So once I learned enough to know what it was I didn’t know, I added some characters, some more sub-plot, a different ending and…well, basically, I wrote an entirely new book.  Then I think I’ve probably rewritten it no less than ten times since.
 

What was the toughest criticism given to you as an author? The best compliment?  I think the toughest criticism given to me came from my mother when she first heard I was writing romance.  She looked at me with a perplexed expression and just as serious as could be and asked, “What do you know about romance?”  HUH?  How the heck do you answer that?  Funny thing is, I think I’ve asked myself that same question dozens of times since.  LOL  The best compliment is actually a toss-up between two comments that came just within the last few weeks.  The first was when a friend who read one of my blogs commented that it brought to mind Erma (OMG!!!) Bombeck and another was when a good friend emailed me to ask if I had ever read Janet Evanovich.  She said she had just finished Explosive Eighteen and the story and writing reminded her of mine. HOLY FREAKING COW!  You should have been there for the squeeing and happy dancing on both occasions!  If I could only aspire to be half as funny and witty as either of those women, I would die a happy author!   

Is anything in your stories based on real life experiences or purely all imagination?  Ah, the age-old question:  fact or fiction?  Well, it’s a bit of both.  You take a real-life experience, crush it to death until it morphs into something totally unrecognizable, then you add the dialogue you “wish you had said at the time”, do all the illegal (and sometimes immoral) things you were dying to do at the time but knew you’d never get away with, you add a composite of some of the people you’ve known through the years, and win the perfect man of your dreams that you wish you were with today…and, voile…fiction!
 

If your characters could speak for themselves, what would they say?  Help!  I’m trapped and she won’t let me out!
 

Do you write an outline before every book you write?  Nope.  I have always been what they refer to as a “pantser”…but I’m hoping to change that one day because flying by the seat of your pants shaves years off your life.

 

How many people have you killed over the course of your career?  None…yet.  But don’t mess with me—there’s always a first time!
 

Where and when do you prefer to do your writing?  I’m mostly a weekend warrior.  I like to take an entire Saturday or Sunday and drag my laptop to a restaurant to write.  I like to start the day at one of the local Village Inns, where their fabulous wait staff always keeps the coffee coming.  Then I move to Dillon’s at the Zoo and write through lunch and dinner.  When the weather is good, I like to sit on the patio, which borders the flamingo enclosure.  My favorite bartenders (Eric, Linda, and Kaitlyn) make sure I have enough libations to keep the writing juices flowing.  If I get writers block, I watch people or flamingos for a while and something I see will generally trigger an opening…and if not, the drinks are good!
 

Do you ever write in your PJ’s or naked?  I edit at home, so I sometimes do my editing in PJ’s.  As for writing naked…not any more…Village Inn won’t allow it and the flamingos at Dillon’s make me nervous when naked.
 

What are the most important attributes to remaining sane as a writer?  Is this a trick question?  You can’t be sane and be a writer!  Who came up with this question?
 

What will you do when the zombies come?  Haven’t you seen any of the movies?  You have to pretend to be one, but be a slow walker so you end up at the back of the pack and then when they aren’t looking, run like hell.
 

Would you slay a dragon or tame it?  If it didn’t turn my butt into a fried fritter first, I’d probably try to tame it.  I don’t believe in slaying dragons…unless they’re the mean ones with halitosis and warts on their noses that don’t like anything but virgins.  I’m just sayin’…
 

Are you fun to go on vacation with?  It all depends on where we are going.  If it involves holding snakes or jumping out of airplanes, I’m not gonna be a real hoot.  But if it involves little pink drinks with umbrellas in them or cowboys in tight jeans or horses, you’re gonna L-O-V-E me! 
 

Has the dog ever eaten your manuscript?  No…but there were times when I wished it would!  I still have hopes for Skay (shown here)...if anyone could destroy a manuscript, it would be this guy.
 

Do you really go around in a corset, high heels, and a whip, subjugating men?  Uh…no.  (That’s the story I’m goin’ with!)
 

If you were in a bar fight, would you be punching or holding jackets?  I used to be a bartender.  I would be holding jackets (in a pile on top of me on the floor behind the bar).  My momma didn’t raise no fool!  Punching gets you a broken nose.
 

Do you have any advice for other writers?  Yeah, if you’re sane, stay that way and pick something easy like lion tamer or bronc buster.  If you’re not, welcome to my world!
 

Where can your readers stalk you?  Okay, the word “stalk” makes me a little itchy.  But if you’re not a forty year old man living in your mother’s basement with her body in the freezer, playing video games in your tighty whities and cutting letters out of magazines and pasting them into notes, then please…stop by and say hi. 
 

Facebook:      https://www.facebook.com/#!/kayce.lassiter

Blog:               www.happilyeverafterthoughts.com              (here…every other Friday)

Website:         www.KayceLassiter.com         (under construction, so check back later)
 

Before you go, what can you tell us about your latest projects?  Well, I am currently working on the release of my first full length novel, a single-title called Katie’s Rock.  It is a story about a single mother forced to choose between two brothers—will she choose the perfectionist with trust issues or the younger brother who seems to always want what his brother has?  Look for it to hit Amazon.com in early August-2013.  I also have another project which I am currently shopping with some of the New York publishers.  That one is a four-book series and the first book in the series, currently titled Loons of a Feather, is a takeoff on a short story I published back in 2011 as part of an anthology titled Twice Upon a Time.  In Loons of a Feather, we once again ride along for the misadventures of Delta, a fairy godmother who rides a Harley, wears cowboy hats and boots, and has a tattoo on her shoulder that says, “Bite Me, Cowboy!”  I will keep you posted on the fate of this series.
 

I want to add one more thank you to this blog posting…a huge thanks to Lisa Pietsch for her fabulous Social Media Superstar Handbook. 

http://www.amazon.com/Social-Media-Superstar-Handbook-ebook/dp/B00CXWKT5Y/ref=sr_1_13?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372454505&sr=1-13&keywords=lisa+pietsch

If you are a writer, this is a must-have book for your reference shelf, to help you navigate the dark and scary back alleys of social media promotion.  Lisa Pietsch is a social media rock star and in this book she shares her secrets with us writers who are social-media-challenged.  She also has a list of 305 interview questions, which I stole from shamelessly for this interview.  Thanks, Lisa!
 

Well, that’s my story, baseless and bonkers, and I’m stickin’ to it.  Hang on tight now, cuz’ we’re gonna go real, real fast!
 

Love ya,
 

Kayce